Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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