May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
