If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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