she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
