Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?