There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize