i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize