His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
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She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
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Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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