i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
