i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
