its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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