I got her a Nickelback box set.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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