I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
