This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
