"it" just moved
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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