We're facebook friends in real life
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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