I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize