i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
