If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
