If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
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YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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