its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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