sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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