were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Randomize
