you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
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