thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
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let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
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I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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