The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
