do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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