That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
You need Xanax blowdarts
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize