Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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