What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
