i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
