Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
