Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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