you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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