Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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