Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Drunk is a universal language darling
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