our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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