i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
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