That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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