I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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