put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Randomize
