At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I need moral support for this bender
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
