awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize