So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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