so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize