This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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