what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
