my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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