so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
gay sex achievement: unlocked
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been