we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize