I'm lost and stupid without you.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
