he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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