Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
