My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
